Things work themselves out

What a difference a couple days make. Well, that and realizing not to eat before working out.

Completed my second workout tonight and the result was so much better than the first. On that regretable night, I had arrived at the gym to find a packed parking lot and the city's most popular radio station doing a live remote. Never mind, I thought, pulling back onto the street and heading home.

I decided I'd go back later when the post-work crowd had subsided. So I went home and enjoyed a nice dinner with the family of leftover chili. I only had one bowl.

That was enough.

I drove back into town and overcame the apprehension and walked myself into that Gold's Gym Express. I went into the locker room and removed my jacket, put on my iPod and walked decisively out into the large open room full of evvery kind of workout apparatus imaginable. I knew I needed to do some cardio. Yet the bikes were positioned in front of the treadmills which were in front of the ellipticals. So rather than become the evening's entertainment, I headed straight for the back row and clambered up onto an elliptical.

Now this wasn't my first muscle machine rodeo. I know what an elliptical is capable of doing to even people who are in shape, much less morbidly obese people like me. But I was going to take it easy.

I tried to turn it on using a Quick Start button but that didn't take. So I hit start and was then cross-examined with a series of questions that included weight, age, gender and probably middle name. One question it asked was how long I wanted to do it. Five minutes seemed pitifully short - so I typed it in. Finally it told me to start.

Immediately, there wasn't as much resistance as I expected. And I don't recall past ellipticals making you feel like you're moon walking. But this one did and eventually I got the rythym and started walking away. It had little poles on the sides like ski poles and a second place to hold on in the middle front. A couple minutes in, I went to grab the middle ones and the machine flashes an alert that I needed to hold the sensors for my heart rate to be measured. Of course there's no normative data, so it gives me a number that really is nothing more than a number to me. Seems kinda high, but isn't that what exercise is all about?

This thing eventually gets harder. But I try not to let up and look like some guy who hasn't been in a gym in over eight years or more. Then it really surprises me and scares the hell out of me. It says my heart rate is too high! That's not exactly the message a person who lives in fear of a heart attack wants to see the first time he tries getting some exercise. I slow down as much as I can.

The rate slowly falls and I try to keep it just under the warning threshold. I though five minutes would never get there.

When I got done, I worked my way around to some machines to work my upper body. I always preferred to do upper body any way. None of the machines was particularly hard - I just tried to get enough reps in to make it matter. But i was winded and continually looking for a drink of water. Hit the water fountain two or three times between machines. Just wasn't catching my stride. I eventually decided - OK, that's enough.

Went into the locker room and immediately sat on the bench to catch my breath and sort of cool off. I immediately became nauseous. It took everything I had to not throw up. Was hot, uncomfortable and almost dizzy. A stranger who came in noticed me looking odd and said, Hey man, you OK?

Told him I wasn't feeling well and just needed to take it easy for a little while. He said, "yeah, you've got to be careful. You're not going to lose it all on first night."

"Yeah," I replied, with what little courtest laughter I could muster, wishing he'd just leave. And he actually did fairly soon.

I must have sat there for 10 or 15 minutes and finally felt good enough to stand. I gathered my stuff and headed for my truck. Called the wife and told her I overdid it.

My second night was tonight. I didn't eat before I went. I did the bicycle instead of the elliptical. And I did even more upper body, and just a little lower body work. I left feeling pretty good. Reminded me of college when I lifted fairly regularly and enjoyed it.

Maybe this will work out after all. What have I got to lose but a hundred pounds or so?